tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post8953740718384700546..comments2023-06-22T03:36:23.556-04:00Comments on Pr3++yG33kyTh1ng: Rebooting TrekGarrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17923202158010674606noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post-10113494495287789022009-05-18T20:41:00.000-04:002009-05-18T20:41:00.000-04:00I'd never mock Spencer. I would mock space herpes....I'd never mock Spencer. I would mock space herpes. It ran around the space ship looking for a host.<br /><br />You invoke Corvette Summer?<br /><br />I didn't want to bring up Kingdom of the Spiders, but you have forced my hand.<br /><br />Points added for Corinthian Leather pecs, though. I got no argument there.Garrickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17923202158010674606noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post-69510595728345948062009-05-18T19:04:00.000-04:002009-05-18T19:04:00.000-04:00You dare mock VEGA$??? This is Spencer for Hire, ...You dare mock VEGA$??? This is Spencer for Hire, man! For the love of god, is nothing sacred?<br /><br />Two words: Corvette Summer.<br /><br />And lay off Montalban's chest ... it was all natural, no CGI there. In his mid-fifties and his tanned pecs were like rich Corinthian leather. Can you say the same for Ian McDiarmid? His face was like leather ...Joehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15869121057225642771noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post-10253369033701016502009-05-18T18:50:00.000-04:002009-05-18T18:50:00.000-04:00C3POs were a delicious part of a balanced breakfas...C3POs were a delicious part of a balanced breakfast!<br /><br />Lucas is a whore, though I'm not sure that has been firmly established as a negative. Let's leave that point at a draw.<br /><br />According to the Special Edition version of Star Wars, Greedo shot first. I don't like it any more than anyone else does, but the Special Edition version, since it was released later, must be considered canon. This is hella weak, I'll admit, but at least the Star Wars universe would have left Ricardo Montalban his chest hair instead of waxing a grown man for Star Trek 2 in a horrible fit of revisionist jackassery. Lucas would have CGI'd Khan's chest hair into a writhing mass of tentacles and sold a toy packed in goo with tentacles which dried out in three days and needed to be replaced.<br /><br />Also, while green women are a novel idea, Kirk's promiscuity gave us a large part of the premise of the movie Ice Pirates where Robert Urich had to contend with "space herpes". <br /><br />Robert Urich, Joe!Garrickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17923202158010674606noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post-27030244115906640762009-05-18T17:09:00.000-04:002009-05-18T17:09:00.000-04:00Did you ever actually try the cereal "C3P0s"??? L...Did you ever actually try the cereal "C3P0s"??? Lucas is a whore! There were no "Data Bits" shaped like positronic 1s and 0s!<br /><br />And dare I ask who shot first? Lucas neutered Han Solo. Kirk would've shot first ... and Roddenberry would've let it stand.<br /><br />To keep warm, Luke chose to be put inside inside a Tauntaun. Kirk would choose a green chick. Wink wink, nudge nudge.Joehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15869121057225642771noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post-34220061089765941812009-05-18T16:59:00.000-04:002009-05-18T16:59:00.000-04:00Jar Jar Binks was horrible, sure. A character tota...Jar Jar Binks was horrible, sure. A character totally created in a misguided attempt to please children and people who have never been exposed to the franchise. On the other hand, Star Trek never made such an effort. New viewers had to figure out on their own that the resolution to all problems is a "phased tachyon burst". <br />While this has been covered before, The Kessel Run covers a stretch of space riddled with black holes. Eliminating distance from such a trip is a feat of piloting skill.<br />I can see tribbles being a more adorable alternative to ewoks, though the latter definitely moved more toys.Garrickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17923202158010674606noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post-59780443889488796842009-05-18T16:44:00.000-04:002009-05-18T16:44:00.000-04:00Aliens:
Star Trek: Forehead Makeup
Star Wars: ...Aliens:<br /><br />Star Trek: Forehead Makeup<br /><br />Star Wars: Jar Jar Binks<br /><br /><br />Seriously ... this is how you want to play? Do you want to debate which is better, Tribbles or frickin' Ewoks who hump the leg of the pilot who made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs???<br /><br />And should we create a category for confusing units of distance and time???Joehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15869121057225642771noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post-69695780417177175632009-05-18T16:39:00.000-04:002009-05-18T16:39:00.000-04:00Award-winning, world-class forensics coach resorti...Award-winning, world-class forensics coach resorting to "suck it"? I think I probably hit a vital area to merit such a vitriolic response.<br /><br />ALIENS:<br /><br />Star Wars: Cantina scene, puppet and CGI Yoda, Chewbacca<br /><br />Star Trek: Forehead makeup<br /><br />Advantage: Star Wars<br /><br /><br />NOTABLE SECONDARY CHARACTERS:<br /><br />Star Wars: Boba freaking Fett<br /><br />Star Trek: Q<br /><br />Advantage: Star Wars<br /><br /><br />RECURRING CAST MEMBERS:<br /><br />Star Wars: Emperor Palpatine, R2D2<br /><br />Star Trek: Denise "Tasha Yar" Crosby in forehead makeup<br /><br />Advantage: Star WarsGarrickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17923202158010674606noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23529274.post-56032034896532112642009-05-18T16:17:00.000-04:002009-05-18T16:17:00.000-04:00TALE OF THE TAPE
GUIDING PHILOSOPHY:
Star Trek: ...TALE OF THE TAPE<br /><br />GUIDING PHILOSOPHY:<br /> Star Trek: Utilitarianism ("The<br /> good of the many outweighs the<br /> needs of the few or the one.")<br /><br />Star Wars: Incest.<br /><br />Advantage: Star Trek<br /><br /><br />COOL TOKEN MINORITY<br /><br />Star Trek: Sulu<br /><br />Star Wars: Mace Windu<br /><br />Advantage: Push<br /><br /><br />MOST EGREGIOUS REVISIONISM<br /><br />Star Trek: Uhura does a Vulcan<br /><br />Star Wars: MITACHLORIANS? Seriously?<br /><br />Advantage: Star Trek<br /><br /><br />HOT MOM QUOTIENT<br /><br />Star Trek: Winona Ryder<br /><br />Star Wars: Natalie Portman<br /><br />Advantage: Star Wars<br /><br /><br />WORST LINES EVER<br /><br />Star Trek: "Where are your nuclear wessles?"<br /><br />Star Wars: "Hold me like you did, by the lake on Naboo."<br /><br />Advantage: Star Trek<br /><br /><br />Star Trek wins the tale of the tape. Suck it.Joehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15869121057225642771noreply@blogger.com