Wednesday, July 18, 2007

And so yesterday there was almost a violent event on the 28th floor at work.
One of my friends asked me which album contained the song "Yellow Submarine".
And then, he argued about my answer.
And then, my BlackBerry couldn't display the Wikipedia page, which sparked off an avalanche of rage against technology and modern culture and the very idea that The Beatles could fall into something which could be categorized as "trivia". I totally blame the public school system. Where are the Music Appreciation classes? Or even stepping out of an old junker in the school parking lot in a great billow of smoke while "All You Need Is Love" fades out behind you?
And then, he said he didn't know what the name of the album was -- Just that it wasn't what I said.
Also, he reads this blog, so I have to clarify that the song also appears on the album Revolver. In fact, it was on Revolver first.
But if someone asks what album contains the song "Yellow Submarine", I contend that the natural and most complete answer is Yellow Submarine.
In other news, some complete ass has posted "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" online.
Instead of conventionally scanning it, this person took pictures of the book opened to every page. The images are quite blurry and of poor quality.
Given that you can see the pirate's shoe in a few frames and sleeve in a few others (as well as two fingers holding the book open in almost every shot) I'm sure that Scholastic will have someone at his apartment (which has horrible carpet) to show him why what he has done is so very, very wrong.
The Scholastic Copyright Enforcement Squad sends a cold feeling of dread down my spine. These are the men and women who didn't make the cut as librarians because they cracked under the psychological entrance exams. Unstable, violent people who love books.
Put like that, I don't know why I fear them so much. That pretty much describes everyone I know.
I'm going to go on record here: It wasn't me. I would not (take the time to) post copyrighted material on the internet. I have pre-ordered the book at Borders and will pick it up Friday at midnight in all its hard-backed glory. Also, this guy got part of a cola can in one of the shots and it is clearly Caffeine-Free Diet Coke. Obviously, I'm completely uninvolved.

I am, however, 200 blurry pages into book seven myself. I'd rather read the book when I pick it up, but I know that once it is released I'll be unable to visit the internet or speak with another living human until I finish it for fear of having the ending spoiled. My only reasonable choice is to read it now in headache-inducing blurry format.

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