Tuesday, May 19, 2009


Dear Internet,

I should have known that any reference to Star Trek in the same post as Star Wars would result in a recurrence of the hostilities.
While the argument (Trek vs. Wars) is the oldest online argument, the wounds which remain are still bloody. They ache like a phaser blast set to stun and irritate like the sand of Tattooine which gets everywhere.
For some reason, I was still surprised by the reaction in the comments yesterday. I was more surprised last night to discover that I, too, had participated in the harsh words and harsher sentiment.
What I was trying to convey yesterday is that the new Star Trek movie is an homage, not just to Speculative Fiction in general, but to the greatest Speculative Fiction franchise which will ever exist. No offense intended. Far from it, in fact.
The tribute was appreciated. Not to mention long overdue.
I was just trying to say that for the first time in recent memory, someone had made an effort to make Trek watchable. This is good, really!
Trek is finally starting to overcome the bitter history of having a Frenchman Captain of the Enterprise. Of course they'd need to borrow from Star Wars to do so. It was the logical choice, and Spock would be proud.
Side note: Did the Romulans use laser swords, or were laser swords just implied? I can't remember at the moment.
Anyway, like I said, no offense was intended. The effort required to overcome the damage done to the franchise by John De Lancie was monumental and I appreciate it.
To clarify, yesterday's post was an official Pr3++yG33kyTh1ng endorsement of Star Trek. Take a loved one.
If they are ten, like the loved one I brought, they will bring up the references to Star Wars about the time Kirk rides a motorcycle up to the spaceport and it looks like a wretched hive of scum and villainy. And construction robots.
It is a brilliant re-imagining.
Pointy ears! Who doesn't love pointy ears?

Live long and whatever,



Joe said...

Time to mix two concepts that you're bound to appreciate: Bare Naked Ladies and why George Lucas is a hack dating back to pre-THX1138 'look at me I'm a USC film student' days:

"Like Kurosawa I make mad films, okay I don't make films, but if I did they'd have a samurai."

Hidden Fortress, anyone?

Garrick said...

Stealing from foreigners doesn't count.


Joe said...

The Nazis said the same thing.


Garrick said...

World War 2?

World War 2 is exactly the reason no frenchman should ever be allowed to even look directly at a captain's chair.
Especially a frenchman with a British accent.

Joe said...

Hmmmm ...

Overtly racist Rastafarian caricture?


Worst Asian sterotype for supporting characters since Mickey Rooney?


Terribly British (and obviously pederastastic) robot who spends significant "alone" time with a young slave boy?


Token black actor who is portrayed as not only a double crosser but has an odd penchant for half capes rarely seen outside of Dolemite films?


Yes, Star Wars just screams fairness and equality! Meesa think not ...

Garrick said...


None of those characters is from Earth, Joe. They are all aliens.
None of this is real.

If you equate some of the qualities to actual Earth minorities what does that say about the basis of your interpretation?

I'm just sad for you.

Join my Facebook "All Races Are Equal Group", please. We meet on Wednesday nights to mock Methodists.