Pr3++yG33kyTh1ng

You simply would not believe the moronic idiocy I witnessed yesterday. Seriously. I was like "OMG!" and they were like "Shu+ uP, No0b!" and I was like "LOLz!!!oneoneeleven11!!! WTF?" and they were all like "STFU!!!w j00 Pr0bz?!?!" and I was like "whatevz" and they were all like "pwnd sux0rz!!!11!"
But this is neither the time nor the place.
Well it is the place, really. But still not the time.
Today I'm dwelling on the positive. Today is a day for reflection on the awesome instead of the lame.
Today is the birthday of my very best friend in the whole world. And I'm lucky enough that she married me. Go Team Her Low Standards!
Anyone that knows us knows that she is the smart one AND the funny one AND the seriously pretty one.
After knowing her for almost the past decade worth of birthdays, she still manages to regularly steal my breath, ninja-like, any time I'm not expecting it. And sometimes when I am.
No description would be complete without a mention of her tolerance. She puts up with me. Without the benefit of alcohol. My parents couldn't even do that!
She is my moral compass, my favorite movie critic, the greatest artist I know, and the coolest person on the planet.
The question has been asked of me at work,"How can you be so stressed out and semi-murderous at work when you go home to her?" That is a good question. It isn't easy.
The answer is that every day at work I think I've hit the absolute maximum amount I can hate an organization and its cogs and every day some asshat proves me wrong. My capacity to hate knows no bounds.
That isn't the out loud answer. The out loud answer is "Hard work and dedication".
Anyway, Today is a happy day. Today is the birthday of my very favorite person ever.

I love you, Shana. Happy birthday.