Pr3++yG33kyTh1ng

Yesterday I got a garbled call from Shana a little bit after noon. Since my Cingular phone all but doesn't work from within my building (and also since I had just confronted the Desktop Manager about picking a standardized printing platform "for the love of God") I walked downstairs to return Shana's call from the parking lot out back.
We briefly discussed groceries and my need for diet cola. I forgot to ask for vinegar.
I went back in and hopped back on the elevator.
Also in the elevator was the VP of Sales from my last company, talking to a prospective client about staff technical proficiency and guaranteed uptime and such.
He pretended to not recognize me. Nice.
Now, for the sake of history, it should be noted that (while never named) this particular individual is approximately 40% of the co-workers referred to as "sales asshat" back in the day, with the other 60% being about eight other people.
I'm a big fan of karma. I think that eventually karma will even all things out in the end.
For every bad thing that happens to anyone all over the universe, karma keeps score with the intention of evening that score later on, generally in defense of the little guy.
I think karma needs a cape and a mask.
As the door to the elevator closed, I thought about all the horrible things people do to each other every day and I began to be concerned for karma. That is one enormous list at the end of the day. Since I had a few minutes, I decided to help karma out a little, free up some time for karma later in the day so that maybe karma can squeeze in a nap or a couple of rounds of Unreal Tournament.
I smiled and turned and laughed and apologized to the VP of Sales from my last company that I almost didn't recognize him, having left my glasses (for the record, reading only ;)) upstairs.
I made a point to call him by name and ask how he'd been. I also pretended that I hadn't noticed he was trying to close a deal with the third occupant of the elevator.
I talked about the great time I had at the sales/tech mixer that one time and asked how another former co-worker's baby was doing.
Still conversationally, I asked him if they had really instituted random drug testing of the technical staff and if it had caused, through test failures and panic, as massive a turnover rate as I'd heard.
Then I asked how the new techs were working out, knowing they hired the bottom of the barrel this last time.
He blinked at me a bunch of times and had no coherent response.
As I got off the elevator nine floors later, I asked him to call me for lunch sometime and shook my phone at him as if he has the number.
Still smiling my friendliest smile, I thought again about karma. Maybe karma can catch a movie later with the free time I just created. I recommend Snakes on a Plane.