Wednesday, June 21, 2006

I've been having fun with Instant Messenger at work. I'll share my joy here, step by step:

1. Start (or better yet wait for you victim to start) an IM converstation about something work-related. "Is there fresh coffee?" or "Can you print? I think the copier is hosed." are good places to start.

2. Leave your chat window open. You can close it with MSN Messenger, but I like to leave it open as a reminder to finish this project. I tend to drift.

3. Wait a few hours. Seriously, it works better if the other party has time to forget your earlier chat.

4. Resume the chat, though about something else --
a. So I keep stabbing him, but he is still making this weird wheezy noise, you know? So I drove over him again until he quit.
b. We are running out of crawlspace and I think the neighbors are starting to smell stuff.
c. we will see if the asshat is still laughing next time he starts his car, right?
d. I ate part of it but finger bones freak me out
e. i've got half a batch in my trunk but the tub had some kind of soap scum crap and it tastes like lilacs
f. I think it is infected. Normal human skin doesn't smell like that. Living human skin.
g. I'd never been that messed up at work before but I hate that customer so they deserve to have a drunk moving their data
h. so he doesn't take paypal for that because the feds are watching his account
i. what are you going to do with part of a puppy? do you still have the rest?

5. Pause

6. Type "Sorry, wrong chat window. Please disregard."

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