Monday, April 07, 2008

The Best Dollar I Ever Spent


On Saturday we went to a fund-raising carnival at Gwynyth's school. There were games and there was food and Gwynyth dominated the cake walk.

Twice. Pwnd.

But as our dollar-purchased carnival credits wore thin, I spotted the jail.

For $1, they would arrest anyone and hold them until that person produced bail money. It was a pretty awesome example of how law enforcement works in The South and I was glad that they chose to put up an educational area like that in the midst of all the sugary food and prizes.

After deciding my course of action, I told the girl running the booth that Gwynyth was an obvious threat to National Security and should be locked up according to the guidelines drawn out by the Patriot Act.

For the good of America, they did so.

Gwynyth wasn't carrying any credits at all and I'd just blown my last dollar on the lock up part, so neither of us had money for the jury-free release portion of the activity.

I was distracted by something shiny, though, so it all worked out for me.

I suppose her mom bailed her out eventually, even though that violates our long-standing "we do not cover bail" policy. Some parents are too easy on their kids, literally (in some cases) bailing them out before they can learn the tough lessons.

By the time I'd returned to the cell to give Gwynyth some cigarettes (since I have heard those are like money on "the inside"), she was gone.

I found Shana and Gwynyth later in the karaoke area. Gwynyth is a little harder for her experience. A little more raw. A little more jumpy. And, if current statistics bear out, 30% more likely to shank a stuffed animal if she perceives it cutting in line for the showers. 

I don't know if it is at all related, but on Sunday Gwynyth helped me pack my stuff for the first time since I announced my pre-move to South Carolina. It could be she is either "scared straight" into an enhanced feeling of responsibility or that she just wants me gone.

I think I appreciate the help packing either way.

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