Thursday, July 20, 2006

I dragged myself into work yesterday.
I hate it so much . . .
Ok, enough of that.
Except that I had to listen to salespeople giving me credit for the report that should earn nothing but blame. And automating the process of falsifying data was actually kicked around a bit as a time-saving option.
Alright! Done!
Wait, hang on! When people take a few days off for whatever reason in normal jobs, does stuff get done? Because by the amount of crap piled up to do around here I'm starting to suspect they closed up shop to mourn my absence.
Never mind all that, though.
Comics . . . Tabletop Role-Playing Games . . . PlayStation Two stuff . . .
Ok, so also at work there was an initiative to finally document all of the stuff I've been complaining about the lack of documentation about -- except that if the process seems weird (And they all do) it needs to be cleaned up in the documentation.
What?!? Now we fictionalize documentation?!? Internal documentation?!?
Whatever . . . I read the first comic in the second volume of Runaways. It covers the transition to official super heroes and features a support group for ex-child superheroes kind of like those you see for former child actors.
But did I mention that I've been put in charge of the fake documentation project? Because I have a skill at making fictional technical documentation look just like the real thing.
Seriously. Enough complaining about work.
Did you know that the same take out container of sweet and sour chicken has been in the fridge in the break room since before Christmas? I knew that, but I've been ignoring it on purpose. I'm not touching the thing.
Ok, forget it. I'm through complaining for the day.
I hooked up the PS2 to our home network and played a hack and slash online for a bit while my daughter cheered. Then orcs killed me.
So I requested these stupid security patches get rolled out over the weekend, but did it get done? Hell, no.
You know why? Because no one else cares, that's why! I've learned that being the only one who cares (or provides the appearance of caring) just makes a person look like a sap.
Sorry. This time I mean it.
I heard on a Podcast yesterday about an interesting game mastering technique and I'm anxious to try it out when we get around to playing D&D again.
So at work they are requesting that we park around back near the construction area to leave the shady spots for customers and sales people who need to look their best. It doesn't matter that I get here at 6am, I'm supposed to drag my car around back and park in the mud. It isn't easy to shuffle through mud in backless shoes.
Geez.
I apologize.
Deep calming breaths.
Deep calming breaths.
Plans for today include inserting words into fake documentation to tip off the casual reader.
Words like:
1. Batman
2. Geriatric Pr0n
3. Cat Fancy
4. w00+
5. Lightsaber
6. Venti
7. Justin Timberlake
8. Hydro-colonic
9. Grouse
10. Company name deleted to comply with non-disclosure agreement

3 comments:

Andrew Rhodes said...

ooo, ooo, put in nips and giblets!!!

Garrick said...

Giblets. How could I leave out giblets?

Pamela Moore said...

Giblets is good. Giblets = w00+!

A word I've always loved is turds. It's a great word, and it sounds like what it is.

Colostomy is nice as well. "The Microsoft licenses are filed in the colostomy behind the nips and before the giblets."