You may remember my nostalgic run through the Kobold mines?
Anyway, I'm still fighting with customer service in an attempt to gain access to my old character from back in the day. I left him sitting on the banks of the Lake of Ill Omen. The least I can do is walk him back home.
So I started over with a new account and a new character, still in the Kobold mines, and ran around smashing cave rats, bats and spiders, slowly gaining levels and skills and abilities and gear.
Run up, target the monster, hit "1" for Auto Attack, get a cola, loot the corpse, repeat.
What is the appeal?
I finally figured it out last night. I get no sense of accomplishment at work at all. I have no idea why I still show up. I feel totally superfluous and physically nauseous as soon as I show up in the morning.
Smashing virtual vermin is honest work. I clear the tunnels for my co-workers and protect the weaker players while sharpening my skills, progressing in power and wealth and gaining better equipment.
I get everything I need from a job except the ability to pay my real-life mortgage which is, in turn, the only reason I continue to drive in everyday.
Now that I have this new found awareness, the first order of business is to suppress it during my "Work Week Prioritization" lunch meeting with management.
"You know, members of the sales team are starting to look like Kobolds to me," makes no sense out of context and just makes me long for a "Rusty Steel Sword" and "Splintered Wooden Shield" to protect the noobs.
Poor noobs. They'll have to protect themselves for a bit.
3 comments:
Seeing kobolds in place of co-workers makes sense in that Tom Hanks/"Monsters and Mazes"/cautionary tale sort of way.
Whatever happened to that guy? It was like he fell off the face of the Earth after 'Bosom Buddies'.
I think he's still living in his mom's bedroom, forever marveling at the magical returning coin.
In all seriousness, I think bringing a hand-and-a-half bastard sword to work and leaning it menacingly against the edge of my desk while I kick back and pick the venison out of my teeth with a goblin rib bone shard would keep the boss and his dumb questions/comments at bay.
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